After 6 years of enthralling us, the fans of my beloved Manchester United and annoying the fans of Scum, Rent Boys and Le Arse with moments of sublime skill and sheer audacity Ronnie has decided to seek newer challenges in greener (and sunnier) pastures of Spain. United have accepted a bid of $ 130 Million from the Satan’s in Spain- a world record deal which will be signed sealed and delivered when Ron agrees personal terms in the coming days. Born on 5th February 1985 in Funcal on the Portuguese island of Madeira to an alcoholic father (who he dearly loved) and a mother who shared the same burning ambition as her son that he would one day play in the white of Real Madrid, he decided to further his footballing education under the tutelage of arguably the greatest manager of all time Sir Alex Ferguson and joined United in the summer of 2003.
Legend has it that- United were playing a pre-season friendly against Sporting Lisbon (Ronnie’s former club) and a spotty young kid was running circles around the likes of Gary Neville/Wes Brown and John O Shea and they came in at half time and pleaded with the manager to sign this bloke as they never ever wanted to play against him. Sir Alex was equally impressed and had instructed the devil incarnate Peter Kenyon (our ex-CEO) to not come back to Manchester without signing this kid. Ronnie joined us in 2003 and was asked to carry on the tradition by wearing the famous number 7 jersey previously worn by legends like George Best, Bryan Robson and David “Golden Balls” Beckham- Not an easy task for a kid from the Iberian Peninsula who is to play in alien conditions. He was seen as initially as a one-trick show pony that was more interested in the tricks and flicks rather the end product. He moved from strength to strength and was rightly won the prestigious Ballon d'Or seeing off competition from the little magician Messi. Later in the season he was crowned FIFA world player of the year.
Ronnie has achieved everything there is to achieve with Manchester United – a hat-trick of premier Leagues, 1 FA Cup, 2 League Cups, 1 Club World Club and the big one- UEFA Champions league. In this time he had also won the golden boot and the player of the season awards. No right minded fan would begrudge him as he pursues his childhood dream after everything he has done for us in the past 5 seasons. To top it all he is making us richer by $ 130 Million (which is higher than the GDP of the island nation of Kiribati) which is over and above all the replica shirts he has helped us sell in the past 5 years.
The audacious back heel against Aston Villa, the forty yard screamer against Porto and amazing counter attack maneuvers with England’s boy wonder will remain long in our memory. No amount money can help us replace a champion like you and it will be a shame that we will no longer hear the fans of scum try to belittle your achievements while craving to find a player like you to wear their jersey. Good luck son and thanks for the memories. You will be missed and will always be one of us.
THERE IS ONLY ONE RONALDO and it is not the one from brazil- That is the highest compliment any one can ever pay you as we all know how bloody good the magician from Brazil was. With stunning looks and a chiseled body, amazing skill and huge amounts of money- Most women want to be with you, most men want to be you and then there are some men who want to be with you.
Cheers
S
Legend has it that- United were playing a pre-season friendly against Sporting Lisbon (Ronnie’s former club) and a spotty young kid was running circles around the likes of Gary Neville/Wes Brown and John O Shea and they came in at half time and pleaded with the manager to sign this bloke as they never ever wanted to play against him. Sir Alex was equally impressed and had instructed the devil incarnate Peter Kenyon (our ex-CEO) to not come back to Manchester without signing this kid. Ronnie joined us in 2003 and was asked to carry on the tradition by wearing the famous number 7 jersey previously worn by legends like George Best, Bryan Robson and David “Golden Balls” Beckham- Not an easy task for a kid from the Iberian Peninsula who is to play in alien conditions. He was seen as initially as a one-trick show pony that was more interested in the tricks and flicks rather the end product. He moved from strength to strength and was rightly won the prestigious Ballon d'Or seeing off competition from the little magician Messi. Later in the season he was crowned FIFA world player of the year.
Ronnie has achieved everything there is to achieve with Manchester United – a hat-trick of premier Leagues, 1 FA Cup, 2 League Cups, 1 Club World Club and the big one- UEFA Champions league. In this time he had also won the golden boot and the player of the season awards. No right minded fan would begrudge him as he pursues his childhood dream after everything he has done for us in the past 5 seasons. To top it all he is making us richer by $ 130 Million (which is higher than the GDP of the island nation of Kiribati) which is over and above all the replica shirts he has helped us sell in the past 5 years.
The audacious back heel against Aston Villa, the forty yard screamer against Porto and amazing counter attack maneuvers with England’s boy wonder will remain long in our memory. No amount money can help us replace a champion like you and it will be a shame that we will no longer hear the fans of scum try to belittle your achievements while craving to find a player like you to wear their jersey. Good luck son and thanks for the memories. You will be missed and will always be one of us.
THERE IS ONLY ONE RONALDO and it is not the one from brazil- That is the highest compliment any one can ever pay you as we all know how bloody good the magician from Brazil was. With stunning looks and a chiseled body, amazing skill and huge amounts of money- Most women want to be with you, most men want to be you and then there are some men who want to be with you.
Cheers
S
